Back in the House

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After 17 months living in our trailer, some of them spent traveling, some camped in Ashland, Oregon, and the last two in our own driveway in Taos, New Mexico, we moved back into our house yesterday. It's been empty since the end of September, but we stubbornly insisted that we'd sell it any minute, and didn't want to bother moving back in, only to have to move out again. And then winter hit, with single digit temperatures at night, and frozen pipes in a trailer that was never meant to be used in this kind of weather.

I'm not sure how I feel about this. Yesterday I felt terrible. I felt defeated. I felt like we'd wasted all those months we spent looking for Home, only to be plopped right back where we started. Talk about taking the long way home...

I guess we could have saved ourselves a lot of effort by just staying put in the first place. But I don't really believe that. If we'd never gone out there, we wouldn't have had all the adventures, and would still be here wishing we could get away. We did it. We got away, and we came back. Maybe we'll go away again. Maybe Home will turn out to be Ashland, or someplace on the coast, or another, smaller, house in Taos. Or maybe it will be this house, right here. It's ridiculous to worry about it, and useless to try to guess what will happen. Everything in life is temporary, so we might as well enjoy it all. And so, for now, we're Home. And we really need to paint the living room...


Comments

  1. CarleneDecember 1, 2010 at 9:33 AM

    I'm a big believer that things work out the way they are supposed to. And sometimes you just do what ya gotta do. And that might just lead you to another adventure. So, who knows what moving back into the house might bring. At least you know you'll wake up with running water in the morning :)

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  2. Zoe NelsonDecember 1, 2010 at 10:05 AM

    Noticing the comfortable dog, ambient fire in the stove, beer bottle on the table. Looks like home to me! Maybe permanent, maybe temporary. Just enjoy the comforts and roll with it.

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  3. PADecember 1, 2010 at 10:08 AM

    Yea! I've been worried about how you would make out in the trailer during a Taos winter. You've had great adventures while on the road but maybe you could just look at moving back into the house as just a different kind of adventure. Home is truly where there are people who love you and you and Rick can make anywhere home as long as you're together. Polly Anna

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  4. Joan TuckerDecember 1, 2010 at 10:13 AM

    Kim, a story... we moved out of our house , put it on the market.. paid rent for 11 months in a small apt in Seattle. The house did not sell, we moved back in.I was defeated!! Redecorated had a couple of good years. Put it on the market sold in one day.Now and only now do I see the larger plan.We are living in a smaller house, much cheaper in a smaller town. We travel in out rv alot to get the wanderlust thing taken care of and it all worked out.

    I hope it all works out for you. For what its worth, painting the walls of the house did something for the process.I painted it in great colors and it sold as is with very artsy finishes. I think it also let the universe step in and help. Renewing walls must be a kind of magic.Much magic to you in beautiful Taos. Joan Tucker

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  5. williamsburg beaderDecember 1, 2010 at 10:18 AM

    Looks like a warm and cozy place. Remember what Dorothy discovered.

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  6. Prettypics123December 1, 2010 at 10:34 AM

    You are where you are. You are making the most of it. I understand feeling like you are going backwards. But maybe this is just another respite on the long way home. Enjoy the holidays there. More fun than being in a cold, cold trailer with frozen pipes. Let it be. Let it be. Let it be. Let it be. There will be an answer,let it be.

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  7. MoonRaeDecember 1, 2010 at 11:35 AM

    sending light and a little smile......
    ~Sharon~

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  8. AnonymousDecember 1, 2010 at 12:05 PM

    "walls" are pretty symbolic, how about painting a color that feels open,free, unlimiting! I am in a nice big and modern comfortable house, very grateful with no heat or utilities to pay. I had lived in my 8x32 Spartan mobile for almost 7 years. I am learning more and more to enjoy where I am now! Ruth by the Ocean

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  9. Right Here Right NowDecember 1, 2010 at 12:41 PM

    Home is where the heart is....you're already proved that. Moving back into the house is just another step in your journey and that journey is far from over. Celebrate another wonderful day!

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  10. YvonneDecember 1, 2010 at 2:32 PM

    Ah, but the wonderful experiences you have enjoyed over the past months.

    How fortunate you are to be able to move back into such a beautiful home - such views and a place that you know you can love.

    Time will take care of changes when they are due.

    Yvonne

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  11. RuthDecember 1, 2010 at 3:03 PM

    Isn't life fascinating? I don't want to miss a minute of it no matter where I happen to be! You obviously don't either.

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  12. UnknownDecember 1, 2010 at 4:06 PM

    Just enjoy...

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  13. MerikayDecember 1, 2010 at 4:23 PM

    Better to have gone and come back than to not have gone at all!

    Right now I am sitting in my livingroom watching a wonderful shadow dance of tree branches blowing in the wind and being illuminated by the low glowing sun. I see a bit of beauty here and now. I long for more, someplace new and different, but I value this and would have missed it if I hadn't been here in this moment.

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  14. Carolina ElizabethDecember 1, 2010 at 6:01 PM

    I really like what Polly Anna said (and how perfect is the name?!). Just enjoying where you are is an adventure in its self. We have been wanting to move, but can't seem to find the house we like or a buyer to buy ours. We are not the moving type, so we don't want to settle for any thing. We've been in this limbo for a couple of years now and this house, just doesn't seem like home. But that is a mistake on our part, because it is just a building. So, a few months ago, I painted it the colors I wanted (oranges and golds-not selling colors) and set up my studio again, which has been giving me a little bit of money. The teaching job I ended up finded, somehow ended up ten minutes from my home, which seems like a miracle. We still plan to move, just changed our attitudes about the time we are here.

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  15. ThE MidLiFe CrUiSeRDecember 1, 2010 at 6:27 PM

    Our trailer isn't made for the cold weather either. That's why we decided to move into the inlaws' basement over the holidays. Gotta say, I hate being stuck now!! I totally get your feeling of "going backwards". I'm sure it will all work out (doesn't it always??), and I'm thinking of this as a time to reflect and regroup before heading out again. Maybe it will be the same for you guys.

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  16. Dance! VashonDecember 1, 2010 at 7:53 PM

    Merikay, how lovely and insightful.

    Nancy

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  17. PattyDecember 1, 2010 at 10:23 PM

    fireplace, a hot bath & happy warm dogs. Looks like you hit the jack pot!
    Enjoy.

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  18. m.e.December 2, 2010 at 2:51 AM

    "If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it was, and always will be yours. If it never returns, it was never yours to begin with"

    I think your journey was time well spent.
    You set Taos free and it seems to have come back into your hearts.
    m.e. :)

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  19. PainterchickDecember 2, 2010 at 5:58 AM

    Good for you. It looks happy and cozy, a cancerian living room. You are such a wonderful person Kim. I ask the questions you ask constantly. Just know that you are not alone.

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  20. AnonymousDecember 2, 2010 at 6:31 AM

    Home is in your heart...the house is simply a location that can bring you comfort and warmth. Welcome home! Diane in PA

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  21. Texan Zombie GoddessDecember 2, 2010 at 6:48 AM

    I really like the couch :). Very Christmasy!

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  22. KralalienDecember 2, 2010 at 6:59 AM

    Kim, the picture looks like home to me, nice fire, cozy, lovely dog. You learned a lot, had nice experiences, just think of the positive sides.
    Hugs! Carolien

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  23. Sue WillifordDecember 2, 2010 at 7:32 AM

    It's all going to be all right. You can't fight with the Universe. It is unfolding as it should. I used to ask "What the hell is this?" "Why me?" but since then everything has worked out and I am better for it.At the time you don't think you will be fine but you will look back and say "Now I know why that happened." Life is a series of events. So just enjoy the moment. I went to the coffee shop behind Albertson's and bought their St. Joseph statue that you bury upside down in your front yard to help sell your house. I am sending it to my friends in Houston. It worked for me. Sold 2 houses that way and you need to tell the Universe the date you want the house to by. Be very specific. Put the date in the hole with him! Hope to see you soon.

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  24. AnonymousDecember 2, 2010 at 8:07 AM

    Do not feel defeated, you guys had a wonderful event filled few months with a possible new home city in the future. Enjoy the house until the next event happens:-) Suzie

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  25. AnonymousDecember 2, 2010 at 8:35 AM

    Have you had fun this last year and a half? Have you learned anything? If the answer to either of these is yes, then it was all worth it!! You have a great home in a beautiful place-enjoy it while you can!
    Sara in Fl

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  26. janDecember 2, 2010 at 12:33 PM

    Kim, home is where you and Rick are...no matter where that is; home is where your love is....you have had a wonderful adventure, and there are always more to come...for now Taos is home; in the Spring maybe it will be Paris...who knows...be wonderful no matter where you are!

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  27. BabetteDecember 2, 2010 at 4:24 PM

    Homeis where your heart is I think. We can make home almost anywhere. You can love both places - how great is that?

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  28. AnonymousDecember 4, 2010 at 12:08 AM

    Be grateful for the opportunity to have had your traveling adventures. Enjoy where you are, enjoy your studio and the opportunity to let your artistic creations come to life. I have lived vicariously through your adventures and through your beads. I can only hope to be able to experience some of what you have, when my daughter is older. Relax let your hair down and be comfortable where you are. Home is where the heart is, so let your heart relish the comfort of home. From atop my soap box (teeheehee) April N

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  29. Holly S.December 7, 2010 at 12:41 PM

    Kim!!

    I'm SO thrilled you are back in your casa!! I know it's probably felt like more than full-circle to you, all the miles, & beads, the people & stories. But I am anxious & intrigued to see where you shall go from here.

    I've been laying low a bit lately, not due to my own choice, was in the hospital in Santa Fe here for a week and now on to a 2nd Oncologists appt. since then. life leads us where we never expected.

    I'll check in from time to time, as your stories, images and beads mean so much to me. I hope to get back into my studio again soon, i think i have found some answers to the pain part of my current history.

    Wishing you ALL a wonderful holiday season & especially to you kids Kim, WELCOME HOME ~ Taos & all of our Enchanted New Mexico benefit from your return :~)

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